L is for Love

Our first picture as a family of four in June

To me, love is the foundation and defining characteristic of all close relationships, but especially family. I hope we are providing an unconditionally loving environment for our children. With out that, nothing else will matter. I have seen this time and again in my volunteer experience with abused or neglected women and children.  I pray our sons always have a sense of belonging and acceptance within our family unit. We are a family and that is to be honored, protected and respected. 

John 3:16

Love is a universal emotional need that crosses cultures, races, religions, age or gender.  Adolescents especially, will seek that sense of belonging and acceptance where ever they have to if it's not provided by their home family. We build the foundation of our marriage on the rock solid promises of God's love that doesn't change with the culture. We raise God's children knowing it's not about them saving us, it's about us providing for them.  Love isn't mushy, romantic or fleeting. It's not soft or wimpy. Love is everything God is; powerful, strong, courageous, self controlled and selfless. I like much of what Gary Chapman shares about that love is a verb, not a noun. Mainly, it's a choice. It's easy to love when the emotions are there and the other person is filling your love tank. It takes a selfless mature person to love when you're still on the road to forgiveness. It's not dependent on temporary emotions which can be so self motivated. If you're not familiar with his work I can't recommend enough the 5 Love Languages. He has editions for marriage, children and teens. I'm quality time and my husband is acts of service. I'm excited to learn what our children's ours!  I'm so thankful this information among others was provided to us during our premarital counseling.

Love looks much more like a cross
than a heart

Family love to me is
1. The commitment to support, encourage and believe in the best of that person.
2. Unconditional acceptance of their heart, their intent and their motives.
3. Forgiveness that builds history of trust, honesty, humbleness and vulnerability.
4. Support of their dreams and goals.
5. Having a shoulder to cry on,  a loving person to seek advice.
6. It's also about laugh, warmth and safety.
7. Family traditions, shared history and having people who have known you your whole life and you don't have to explain or defend yourself to.

1 Corinthians 13

What family love is not about....

1. Expecting agreement or sometimes even understanding.
2. Believing that person is never going to hurt, disappoint, frustrate or make you feel angry.
3. What the other person can do for you, but what you can sacrifice for others.
4. What you can get, that's using.
5. Manipulation, guilt, anger, smothering or abandonment.
6. Just being there when it's all great or only being there when there is a struggle.





(I did find these images on Pinterest. Please let me know if they are yours and you do not want them posted here)

The cross equals love