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Tuesday, July 3, 2012

MOM: Chapter 6- Teaching Mommy

Every decision we make, every word we speak, every priority we chose, every thing we do brings us closer or farther away from intimacy with God. Our reasons behind our choices reflect much of where our heart is rooted. Are my reasons self centered, culture influenced, spoiled, pampered, indulged based on God planting me in a currently still comfortable country? Do the phrases "what does it hurt?", "it's not that bad" or "they are doing much worse" really the motivating guides for our paths? Or am I concerned with God and His purposes, plans and goals? 

I've been thinking quite a bit about the pillars of faith to focus on and pass to our children.  Chapter 6 in the book "Missions of Motherhood" by Sally Clarkson talks about the teaching side of being a mother and although she is a homeschooling mom, that's not really what she's talking about here. This chapter has hit such a note with me that I've been praying, thinking and dwelling on this topic for the last couple of weeks. This aspect of motherhood, in my opinion, is what I've been searching for. It's the heart of passing on genuine-true- living- giving grace- knowing God- forgiving others- striving for Holiness-plugged in to the power of the Holy Spirit- giving of ourselves- all in- passionate faith. Teaching the heart, reaching it, cherishing it and connecting our faith with real life. THAT is the faith I want to pass on to my children.

I'm going to strive to convey why the topic of teaching faith has struck such a deep chord in my heart. Quite simply, I don't know what that looks like. I think it's relevant and respectful to mention here that I wasn't raised with a relationship with God and everything that entails.  I remember my family going to church twice as a child. I spoke rote prayers infrequently around the dinner table that I did not understand. I remember crying at night afraid to go to sleep because I didn't know what would happen to me if I died in my sleep.  Don't get me wrong, I was raised with morals and caring parents who did the best they could with what they had to love and provide for me and my 3 siblings. To know me before God changed my life and now is to understand the power of God's ability to soften a heart, heal hurts and give His strength. Everything I have become is due to the change in my soul that came from God's love in my life and heart. I came to learn about Christ when I was 16 and felt His patience and true love when 10 years later I really started to embrace and fully accept Him not only as my Savior but the Lord of my life. I have felt since then as though I'm playing catch up with all of those raised more closely in the faith. I've come to realize that's a matter of spiritual warfare. God grows each of us in His time and in His way for His glory. It's not about me and my maturity or my growth. God meets each of us exactly where we are at and when we call to him, He will answer us and tell us great and unsearchable things we do not know. (Jeremiah 33:3)

Every mother is going to pass on what we think and what we are to our children. It's not just in the moments of correction, training, teaching and sharing. It's our life, priorities and decisions observed by our children. Our tone of voice, our words, our body language, our respect for others, what we say about people when they aren't around, integrity, honesty, purity, hard work, compassion, our choices of entertainment, how we chose to use our gifts, time and money and on and on. After reading through Judges, I was convicted to think what if the one thing I'm lackadaisical about is the Achilles heal for my children? While I know and trust God with my children's faith walk, I also am called not to be a stumbling block in their faith. I am called to handle my stuff, to grow and mature, to provide for my children's best well being spiritually. We are their model for adulthood in bright neon letters up close in their face not to be ignored. Long gone are the days of 'Do as I say and not as I do" A child can see through hipocracy, inconsistency, falseness, superficiality and lip service in a heart beat especially when we don't practice what we preach.

So what's our motivation? What and who is our inspiration? Who is earning our loyalty to define ourselves? Whose goals and dreams are modeling after? What influences are we focusing on? What are we filling our ears and eyes with??

My faith and belief in who God is, what He wants for my life and my purpose on this planet should effect my choices. That includes areas of entertainment with music, movies, internet (facebook, pinterest, email, blogs, twitter) television, books, iphone games. I get the feeling, from myself at times as well as others, that we feel these pleasant luxuries are somehow laced in to our inalienable rights. We want some down time, fun and laziness- spiritually, mentally and physically. If I'm relying on my own strength or the strength of anything else outside of God, absolutely that would be 'needed'. If this life was all about me and my wants, then yes, put anything out there on social media that you want, no matter what it reflects because like it or not, we are ambassadors for Christ in this alien planet. This is NOT our home. This isn't the end, this isn't the goal, we haven't reached our prize. We have a job to do and HE will give us the strength to use any resource man comes up with to shout the love, grace, holiness and power of God to every one we possibly can. Do it with love, do it with relationships in mind, do it subtly or out loud, do it quietly in prayer over the things you see, but do it. Encourage others, offer to help someone who expresses they are struggling or having a bad day. Do something with what you see and read online from friends. Be the feet and arms of Jesus. Use that to love people better.

The temptation to place the blame on our culture, ( I do this quite a bit- that blame shifting we are so good at instead of confessing real sin) to detach and walk away from it all still won't solve the problem in my own heart. The things will never be the problem. Yes, there are temptations to portray our lives, relationships, activities, personalities and morals better than they actually are. Social media can be a huge breeding ground for comparing, feeling left out and not good enough. I could deactivate my facebook account, take the blog sites down, get rid of the phone, tv and music and I'd still be left with the root of the problem and that's me. My selfishness and lack of being rooted in Christ's Holy word won't be solved by looking down my nose at those avenues or those who participate in them.

So, do we believe this in our hearts that God's word is alive, relevant and part of every decision we make in this world???
"2 Timothy 3:16-17 All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work."
That includes every area of our lives, it's all interconnected. It all belongs to God!

The areas of teaching children Sally talks about are....

1.  Law and Morality: Right from Wrong- using teachable moments to draw myself and my children back to God's word. ( I believe lots of people, myself included, only do this one for most of the time)

2.  Biblical Literacy: Scripture- daily reading. Knowing the facts and seeing God's love in each story.
Bible devotion time: ARTS A-Ask a simple question about the passage before reading the story. 
R- Read the passage enthusiastically and with interest.
T-Talk about the passage (give background, ask kids what it mean to them, how the people acted in the story or what God was trying to communicate)
S-Supplication. Close the time by praying together to apply what you've studied together.

(I'll add more thoughts as I continue through the Chapter)
3.  Theology: Teaching the Knowledge of God- "The degree to which our children can comprehend the holiness, sovereignty, omniscience, omnipotence, and redemptive love of our heavenly Father will determine the depth of their faith and devotion to him."
 "Authentic faith.... is lived as though God had called them specifically to himself to accomplish great things for him during their short lives."
"Rather than use lofty formal language to address God or use our prayer time to give him a shopping list of what we want him to do, we address him as someone with whom we have a close, trusting, respectful relationship."

4.  Wisdom: Teaching God's Point of View. "Wisdom refers to both the practical insight or knowledge  and discernment about how to make decision. In the biblical sense, being wise mean understanding God's point of view about daily life and the whole scope of the universe and learning to live and act according to his perspective. In one sense, this wisdom cannot be taught; it is something that grows with maturity and experience. "

"The heart of the gospel is a series of wisdom principles that are completely counter intuitive, even preposterous or scandalous in the world's eyes.... losing ourselves to find ourselves. Going last to be first. Leading by serving. Dying in order to live."

5.  Faith: Teaching trust in God's reality and reliability- Talk about God. Deuteronomy 6:6-9
" When we know God's moral laws, understand basic biblical theology, and have a grasp of the wisdom principles of Scripture, then we have a foundational basis upon which to act in faith. Faith is not a matter of mindlessly believing in God. It is believing him because of the soundness of the foundations he provides in our lives."

"Faith's certainly not a matter of checking our minds at the door and refusing to think. Rather, it is a commitment of our wills to trust God with our lives, based on the inherent value of his domain and creation, and the astuteness of his wisdom. It is a personal decision we make based on our trust in the validity of these things- not a feeling that we drum up.  This faith will lead us through the dark times when there is no feeling and the ecstatic times when God seems very close. "

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