Healing Grace

I've been keeping up with a study my old church is doing and wanted to pass this on. We live in such a work/ achievement based society. It's easy for me to fall in to the "servant" instead of being the "child".

When Devadas came next to see me, he was visibly excited. “Until Sunday I never realized that I have been literally living up to my name — ‘servant of God.’ I have been thinking and feeling and living not like a family member should, but like a servant does.” Since everyone in India clearly understands the difference between the two, I said to him, “Devadas, let’s do some role playing. You be the servant in the family, and I’ll be the son. Let’s live out a day in their lives, from morning to bedtime, and see what the differences are.” He agreed. Before long we were really into it, putting into words the wide difference between our roles.

The servant is accepted and appreciated on the basis of what he does, the child on the basis of who he is.

The servant starts the day anxious and worried, wondering if his work will really please his master. The child rests in the secure love of his family.

The servant is accepted because of his workmanship, the son or daughter because of a relationship.

The servant is accepted because of his productivity and performance. The child belongs because of his position as a person.

At the end of the day, the servant has peace of mind only if he is sure he has proven his worth by his work. The next morning his anxiety begins again. The child can be secure all day, and know that tomorrow won’t change his status.

When a servant fails, his whole position is at stake; he might lose his job. When a child fails, he will be grieved because he has hurt his parents, and he will be corrected and disciplined. But he is not afraid of being thrown out. His basic confidence is in belonging and being loved, and his performance does not change the stability of his position.

Healing Grace, pg. 22-23